Wednesday, December 1, 2010

The Super-Hanukkah Song

Repurposed lyrics by Adam Sandler:

Put on your yarmulka, here comes Hanukkah
It's so much fun-akkah to celebrate Hanukkah,

Hanukkah is the Festival of Lights,
Instead of one day of presents, we have eight crazy nights.

But when you're the only kid in town without a Christmas tree,
here's a list of people who are Jewish,
just like you and me:

Aline Kominsky-Crumb lights the menorrah,
So do the Thing, Colossal Boy, and Team Youngblood's Masada

Guess who eats together at the Carnegie Deli,
Brian Michael Bendis, and Mad Magazine's Al Jaffee.

Bobby and Kitty from "X-Men" say the Chanukah blessing.
So does their foe Magneto, not one to be messing.

Scarlet Witch is half Jewish,
Wesley Dodds is half too
Put them together
What a knockout Wiccan Jew

Moon Knight and Ragman throw blows with such precision.
But the one thing they couldn't fight their way out of?
Painful circumcision.

Joe Simon and Trina Robbins never mixed meat with dairy.
Nor did Maus' Art Spiegelman or pervert animator Ralph Bakshi

You don't need to Deck the Halls or Rock Around the Christmas Tree
Cause you can spin a dreidl with Jack "King" Kirby and Stan "the Man" Lee--both Jewish!

Green Lantern-- not a Jew!
But guess who is... Bill Finger, Mart Nodell, Gil Kane and Julie too!

People thinking Lex Luthor's a Hebrew really hurts,
Well, he's not, but guess who is: All three Kuberts!

Marv Wolfman, Mort Weisinger and Art Spiegelman attended shul.
Shuster & Siegel invented Superman
But first came Hebrew school.

Prime from Malibu Comics was a Jew
and we hope someday to have him back,
Rā's al Ghūl's other daughter is half-Jewish
'Cause we're pretty good in the sack.

So many Jews are in the comic biz--
Bruce Banner isn't, but I heard Doc Samson is.

Tell your friend Volcana, it's time to celebrate Hanukkah
I hope I get an Absorbasconicah, On this joyful, toyful Chanukah

So visit Bizarro World-icah, and jerk off to Howard Chaykin-a-kah,
But I Digressikah, Have a happy, happy, happy, happy


Tom Hartley said...

Let's hear it for the Jews in space
Keeping kosher out among the stars
Lighting a menorah on nearby planet Mars
Okay, not Jewish looking, that giant face
And their Manhunter, John Jones? What kind of name is that?
But he was drawn by a guy named Netzer... or maybe Nasser
By any other name, someone Abraham begat

Diabolu Frank said...